yall demanded it

What the hitstickers or whatever you call yourselves want is what you get. Rich Rod just straight doing his thing. #2 can't even believe it. Me neither bro. Me neither.

Commish giving you free money - lock it in

Mississippi State @ Oklahoma St. -12

I picked Oklahoma State to win the big 12, but that's partly because I hate Texas and Oklahoma more than a normal person probably should. Listen, I know the big 12 is a joke and they can't hold the SECs jock but something tells me Gundy has some tricks up his sleeve. I look for Oklahoma State to try and run the score up when they have this game in hand just to make a statement they won't be pushed around by the SEC. And honestly when your coach has moves like this you can't help but just beat peoples ass from time to time. Yea I see you #84

Mother nature is a cunt

It's suppose to be hot as hell tomorrow. Literally that's probably the only time I've been accurate on that saying. Heat index around 103. That means on the field it's going to be about 120 degrees. 120 Fucking degrees are you kidding me? I really hope this somewhat cool summer we've had doesn't bite us in the fan. Figure it out mother nature the hogs got a game tomorrow and it's pretty important we make a bowl this year. And to do that you crazy bitch it's vital we beat the rajin Cajuns in 21 hours. What a cunt.

Hawaii... Always Covers On the Island

I broke my own golden rule.  I bet against Hawaii when they were on the island.  Despite USC covering with less than a minute to go Hawaii still managed to score somehow.  NEVER AGAIN!!


PS - Saturday's picks will be out early. Don't miss out on the heater!

YTD: 1-1

Fantasy Baseball Update....

For anyone wondering how fantasy baseball is going, I'm still beating the shit out of the Commish.

Gambling Season is Finally Here

Thursday night is the official start to the college football season which also means it's the official first night of gambling season.  For the next seven months us degenerates have the ability to become rich lose tons of money to some guy we barely know on the sports we love; football and basketball.  In honor of this glorious night here are the picks that won't miss.

5* - UNC @ South Carolina     Under 57.5

UNC has a pretty good QB in Bryn Renner (not a typo, clowns) but in my opinion he is a product of the system he is in.  He will drop back to pass 35+ times which will give Clowney and the rest of the South Carolina defensive line plenty of opportunities to pin their ears back and wreak havoc.  Although the rest of the South Carolina defense is unproven to this point the D-Line will make this one easy.  Although USC will have a big lead for most of the game I think UNC will score late to cover the points.  South Carolina 30  UNC 20.

Late Night Money Doubler - USC -24 @ Hawaii

Anyone who has sat around me and discussed games that we love I have one rule... NEVER BET AGAINST HAWII ON THE ISLAND which on the flip side.. NEVER BET HAWAII ON THE MAINLAND.
 Typically this is good advice except for Thursday night.  Not only is USC head and shoulders better than Hawaii in all facets of the game but they also have Lane Kiffin's wife cheering them on.  Let it ride from the winner I gave you earlier and go to bed early because there will be no need to sweat this one out.  Wake up and count your money.


I'm keeping score this year.  You can go ahead and chalk these up.
YTD:   2-0

If you aren't watching Bad Girls Club you should be ashamed of yourself

Bad Girls Club comes on Oxygen. Oprah just playing chess while MTV still playing checkers. Pretty much the whole point of the show is for the skanks ladies to get drunk, show their boobies, and punch each other in the face. 'Merica.

PS if anyone out there knows anything at all about gifs or vine congratulations you're our first intern.

It's Hot as Hell

I've got to admit she's probably talking about me. I pretty much hate when it gets cold and there's snow and ice out. You can't even play in the snow here. It just gets you cold and wet and pisses you off. Why can't it just stay fall forever?

Who the hell is buying all this damn meat? Every day can't be a holiday. Classic angry black lady. Love it.

Hawk Harrelson v Tom Hamilton

Hawk Harrelson is my absolute least favorite announcer in any sport. He's the reason I can never draft a Chicago White Sox player on my fantasy baseball team. I just have to hate them. I will say this though. He absolutely cracks my shit up when bad stuff happens to the White Sox. I guarantee you the little nerd in the booth with him is terrified night in and night out. DADGUMMIT! NO! MAN! MERCY!


Tom Hamilton absolutely wipes the floor with Hawk. I grew up in a small town in southern Michigan and was born to a bloodline to loyal Cleveland Indian fans. I learned 2 things from my family's passion for Cleveland Indians baseball.
1. If the satellite says you're locally blacked out and cannot view the game, just simply call them up and let them know as sternly as you can that you're going to tear the motherfucking dish out of your roof and throw it into the street. That usually gets it turned on.
2. Tom Hamilton is the best radio play by play man in the business. Just rips it.

GAME WEEK PREP- UL LAFAYETTE

To start our season off this year we're matched up against the pre-season favorite to win the Sun Belt Championship and also Sun Belt player of the year in Terrance Broadway. Last year Broadway led his team to 9 victories while throwing for 2,842 yards with 9 interceptions while finishing 19th overall in the FBS in passing efficiency. He also rushed for over 700 yards and 9 touchdowns. After never winning a bowl game in program history ULL has went to and won a bowl game in each of the last two years. 

1-0 is the motto. Time to prove it or we look like a bunch of ass clowns. Last year we started 1-0 but I had a terrible taste in my mouth. We didn't look like a team that could compete in the SEC and apparently we couldn't even compete in the Sun Belt. 

This year is different. It has to be. It better be. Right? 

Well we are going to find out real quick one way or another because this isn't just some rag tag team we're playing. Most years I wouldn't look twice at this game but we all know what happened last year and what's on the line for this game. After we lost last year, all hope went down the shitter. I've been pumped up about our new found hope but it won't mean anything unless we walk away with a win Saturday. 

Keys to victory:

* Contain the zone read- it seems like Arkansas has fits with dual threat quarterbacks and that's exactly what we face Saturday. I hear we've had a good look in practice lately with Duwop, our freshman quarterback, running the scout team. Hopefully that's a good start but I doubt Duwop throws the ball as well as Broadway. Chris Smith and Trey Flowers are going to have to be disciplined and not try to do too much. Keep your contain and do your job and trust that Randy Shannon has our Linebackers finally ready to come up and knock someone backwards.

* Be more physical- ULL is returning 9 starters and most of there O Line. They feel like they are better than last year and there is no doubt they would've beaten us last year. Now we have to establish ourselves as an SEC team by pushing them around at the line of scrimmage. Football is played in the trenches and I'm excited to see what our lines look like. From what I'm hearing our D-Line should be our strongest position and our O-Line has gelled nicely over the preseason led by pre-season all SEC Center, Travis Swanson.

*Control the clock- This kind of goes along with being more physical but I believe ULL has been known to run a high paced offense. It's pretty important that we counter that by keeping our defense on the field and establishing a run game. It's no secret our goal this year is to be able to run the ball but if we can't get the run going against a Sun Belt team that allowed 4.8 yards a carry vs ECU in a bowl last year. ECU scored 34 points. I don't think we did that in any game last year.

*Set the tone on D- It's been a long time since I can remember our defense knocking people backwards. I guess our coaches were too busy hammering x's and o's and not on how to wrap up and drive your feet. It wouldn't surprise me if we never spent one second in practice last year in tackling. This year we have a team with something to prove. Our players have commented on how surprisingly physical camp was this year. In Bielema's press conference the other day he was surprised at how surprised everyone on the team was. Meaning we practiced like pussies. Now we're hitting people in practice and breaking arms and shit. I'm getting so fired up typing I gotta change the subject.

* Win pre snap- it seems like last year we were beat before the ball was even snapped. I literally don't think anyone knew what was going on or where they were suppose to be. This year in scrimmages and practice Coach B implemented taking the player out if they jump offsides, allowing the players backup to get in and take reps. I don't really think Petrino did anything in practice except throw the fade from the pass skeleton. Even then he tied the DBs hands behind there backs to give our QB 'confidence'. Well that's just stupid so maybe Coach B was able to get everyone's head out of their asses and made sure we practiced like winners should. 

*Be special on special teams- nothing is more deflating than a kick return for a touchdown against us or a blocked/missed field goal. Hocker is going to do everything except pooch punt and that's just because his leg muscles are literally too strong to do that. It would be nice to win the battle of field position based off our kicking game. In order to upset some teams later in the season our special teams needs to be an exclamation point instead of a question mark. I believe Eric Hawkins will be returning kicks and he's suppose to be the fastest receiver on the team. Well I remember when Dmac and Felix took every kick to the house so I'd be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed that Alex Collins isn't returning kicks. Seems like just yesterday Dennis Johnson was taking the opening kickoff to the season to the house.

Final Score prediction:

Arkansas 26 - ULL 16

Shit just got real

The Hit Stick Sports Football Dynasty League of Champions just took a turn towards awesome town. If you can't get down with this you aren't American.

Football. Eagle. America. Fuck Yea!

Wait 'til Next Year

As a 27 year old Cubs fan I've only had a couple of years that I actually had to pay attention to them past July.  Most years we suck and we can expect to suck the following year simply because Jim Hendry was quite possibly the worst GM in the history of baseball.  He had a few bright spots here and there but his propensity to pay over market value for over the hill players has hog-tied us for the last four or five years.

Finally, I think the Cubs have a the right people in the front office and a plan to be successful.  Jed Hoyer and Theo have made a number of good moves since the came over to the North Side. The building blocks are in place for the Cubs now.  They have finally stocked some talent in the farm system.  Here's the top 5 Cubs down on the farm:


1) Javier Baez  SS
At only 20 years old Baez has shown this year that he can rake.  No matter what level the Cubs put him at he has been producing.  I don't care what level you're at.  If you're only 20 and can hit 34 HRs then I'm a believer.  Take a look at his stats for 2013 between A and AA:

                           G      AB   R   H     2B  3B  HR   RBI BB   K    SB  AVG  OBP  SLG   OPS
                          122   487  92 139   33    4    34   101  38  137  20  .289     .346  .579    .925

  

2) Albert Almora OF
Another young guy that is proving to be a complete stud both in the field and at the dish.  Almora is a plus defender in center field that has a laser-rocket arm.  At the plate, he's shown that he can mash the ball from gap to gap and has flashed some power that makes you think he could develop into a 20 HR big leaguer.


3) Jorge Soler  OF
Soler was one of three Cuban outfielders to sign with major league teams in 2012. You've probably heard of the other two; Yasiel Puig and Yoenis Cespedes.  As is life as a Cub fan you start thinking that both the A's and the Dodgers's got ROYs and here we are with a guy hitting .289 in A ball.  Don't be fooled by the slow development process of Soler.  He's  huge standing at 6'4" 215 lbs and has displayed raw power that hasn't translated in to big home run numbers yet.  Like Almora he is a plus defender in the OF with a huge arm.


4) Kris Bryant 3B
Drafted by the Cubs in 2013, Bryant was easily the most polished power hitter in the draft.  At the University of San Diego he hit 31 HRs which was far and away the most in College Baseball.  He won the Golden Spikes Award which goes to the top amateur baseball player in the country.  He's a good athlete that played both infield and outfield in college and could potentially be moved to the outfield moving forward.  On a side note his girlfriend isn't very hot so that means he may lack confidence.




5) Mike Olt 3B
We acquired Mike Olt from the Rangers in the Matt Garza deal.  Thought to be untouchable in 2012, an eye injury and a slow start to the 2013 campaign  allowed the Cubs to quite possibly make the steal of the trading season.  As we all know Garza only pitched about five games a year for the Cubs anyway so being able to add a guy like Olt to the roster is a huge return.  Olt has a great approach at the plate.  In 2012 he was able to hit 28 HRs for AA Frisco and had an OBP of .398.  Since coming over in the trade he has struggled but I think we'll see him in Chicago before the season is over.

I know we're the Cubs and all of these guys will forget how to play baseball the second the make it to Wrigley but it still gives me reason to hope.

Did Petrino cost Wilson or does he just suck?

Tyler Wilson didn't even see the field in pre season this week and he plays for the Raiders. Like I know I'm a hog homer and all but I honestly thought Wilson would be fighting for the starting position, and he's not even good enough for 4th string. He can't get in over Matt McGloin who I've literally never heard of before. Google says he went to Penn State and you know what went on there. There's zero percent he makes the team now. Zero.

If I remember right, Tyler Wilson was a high projected QB in the draft if he would've came out his Junior year. Stayed to win the championship with Petrino and got John L. Smith and 14 concussions. I went to almost all the games during Tyler Wilson's stint as starting QB and I really thought he depended on his playmakers to make the play. Like how many 3 yard cross route dump downs can you throw in a game? He's the reason Chris Gragg and most our receivers were injured from d-backs taking there legs out.

So the question is did Petrino cost Wilson when he crashed his face into the asphalt? Was Wilson really that good or did Joe Adams, Greg Childs, Jarius Wright, and Chris Gragg just make plays for him? Or was it the fact he got drafted by the Raiders, the ultimate kiss of death for any player ever drafted there. The Black Hole indeed.

Good news for Tyler is my ankle is still bothering me so I'm looking for a flag football QB for Hit Stick Sports. Tyler just get at me on twitter and I'll get you the plays. We only got like 4 so hopefully you can get those down.

Duf-Man

Anyone that watches golf knows that Jason Dufner has been coming on for a while now.  He finally broke through with his first major a few weeks ago at the PGA.  Well I'm here to say that if he's not your favorite golfer then you are probably friends with Brett Cummins.  He wins, celebrates by grabbing his wife's ass.  He dunks it from the fairway for eagle, he tells you to suck it like he's part of D Generation X.  Bottom line, he parties with Charles Barkley, wins golf tournaments, and has a smoke for a wife.  If that's not living the dream then I don't know what is.

Keep an eye on Jarret Lake

I was pretty surprised when I saw Jarret Lake listed as our starting middle linebacker. This guy is a senior that got some playing time last year but was mainly pushed aside when we stuck with a 4-2-5 defense over the 4-3 defense. The last interview I heard from Bielema stated that Lake was the glue that held everything together. He's asserted himself as a senior leader on defense and most importantly he's been extremely coach-able.

That's exactly what we need. A linebacker that's coach-able. We have arguably the best linebacker coach in the nation in Randy Shannon. Last year at TCU he turned a senior walk-on linebacker that had barely any playing time into a second team all big 12 player. Lake has always struggled keeping on weight having fluctuated around the 215 mark has now embraced Coach Herbert and is weighing in at 231. They say he's got a motor that doesn't stop. I need that in my middle linebacker.

This may not be a popular idea but I wouldn't mind redshirting Otha Peters and letting us take advantage of him for an extra year when he fully develops. Just think how good he will be with an extra year with Randy Shannon and Ben Herbert.

Jarret Lake we need you to step up in a bad way. If Lake produces results I believe it sets the tone for the younger players behind him to embrace their coaching. Jarret Lake we also need you to tackle Terrance Broadway when he's scrambling all over the place in 8 days.

8 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Patriots show why they are the smartest team ever

Tim Tebow and I got the same amount of playing time against the Lions last night. Just shows how genius the patriots really are. Don't waste reps on him when the future can get in there and sling it around.

Everyone outside of Arkansas seems to forget what kind of monster is lurking in the wings of Tom Brady. Look this science guy said it himself. Better than Drew Brees and John Skelton, two of the best qbs in the game. Did you see how he was on point throwing through those robot machines? And guess what? That's exactly what the Patriot's offense has proven to be. Robot Machines. I can't even name there receivers and it doesn't matter because the Patriot's are systematic and play sound football. Nothing flashy. Nothing tricky. You can't trick your way to victory in the NFL. You can throw 45-yard-out-routes-that get-to-the-receiver-in-a-split-second your way to victory in the NFL though.

Laser rocket arm. Sweet ass jump man sweatsuit. Swag for days son. One of my biggest regrets in life is when he was kicked out of our fraternity party. We have so much in common. Could've been real good friends I think.

Who got a scantron for Ryan Mallet?? I do buddy. I do.

Early Dynasty Draft Awards and Rankings

Last night Hit Stick Sports launched it's Dynasty Draft and we got through about 7 1/2 rounds. We are doing a slow draft that will take place over about a weeks time. This is the first time 11 of us have done something like this.

12 team PPR. 22 man roster. 12-18 keepers each year. 1 QB, 2 RB, 2 WR, 1 TE, 2 Flex (rb, wr, te), K, D

I doubt you can really see this but I think if you click on it it will enlarge to full screen. Here's what it looks like so far.

Awards:
Balanced Man Award: THE Franchise
Having back to back picks can come in quite handy and I think THE Franchise capitalized on it. Forte and Lynch are 2 top of the line RB1s that arent going anywhere the next 4 years barring major injury. Love Stafford. Wes Welker,  Andre Johnson, and Stevie Johnson will rack up on catches and he has 2 young RBs who could step in as early as this year and be the go to guy. Probably not fair this drafter is the only person in the league to do a dynasty league this year.

Ground and Pound Award: Stick Tackle Boom Boom
Went into this draft wanting a top 5 WR. That didn't happen so I took 4 straight RBs under the age of 25. Was hoping for a better QB than Dalton but he will be serviceable for years to come I think. Had to take him once Romo went off the board since he was the last QB left on my potential starters list.

Matt Millen Award: Here to win Championships
Nope. Not 1. Not 2. Not 3. NOT ANY. Not a good look taking Witten in the 3rd or Tannehill in the 8th. Receivers look decent but he could've gotten way better 1-3 picks. I've said you don't win fantasy drafts in the first round, but you can definitely lose them. Well he just lost this dynasty with his first 3 picks. Jone drew over Ray Rice? Matt Ryan over Drew Brees. Thanks for the donation.

Team IR Award: Willie Beamen
It's probably a safe bet to say the Texans will have a leading rushing attack. Not a safe bet to say it will be Arian Foster the whole way. RBs have a short shelf life and this blogger is beginning to think the end is near. Not really how I would want to set the foundation for my team for the next so many years. Murray has yet to prove he's healthy and Jordy Nelson is experiencing more nerve problems, the same that sidelined him some in college. I don't like repeat injuries. Reggie Wayne's time is limited as well.

All Day Award: Americas *Fantasy* Team
This isn't just because he draft AD himself, I mean, you really have no choice. I questioned the Kaepernick pick with his 2nd pick but when he took Brady I became a believer. Brady has a few years left and he is going to get his. He makes nobody's into somebody's. Then when he's on his way out and Crabtree returns to the field Kaepernick will be tough to beat. In 18 of his 28 games as a Saint Darren Sproles has scored double digits. That's elite back status and in a PPR it's even better.

Homerun Award: Fantasy Team Name
This team has guys that get in the endzone. Cam Newton is a goal line back that can also throw 70 yard bombs in the air. Both RBs have the ability to take it the distance every time they touch it and his WRs are huge redzone targets. If Colston can battle through plantar fasciatis all year this team could win it all.

My early draft rankings
1. THE Franchise
2. Dezzy Does Dallas
3. Fantasy Team Name
4. We Be Trumpin
5. Stick Tackle Boom Boom
6. TAT (Tebow and Toads)
7. WSE3
8. Renegades
9. America's Fantasy Team
10. Blue Steel
11. Willie Beamen
12. Here to win Championships (Not really though because my team sucks)

Let the bitching begin....

Hollywood Officially Doesn't Give a Fuck: Gigli is the New Batman

So there it is. Hollywood finally deciding to rub it in our faces that we'll go see Batman regardless of who plays him. Well fuck that! Ben Affleck!! Ben Fucking Affleck??! I'd rather sit in a theater in Aurora, CO then watch Ben Affleck try to help Superman. I can only imagine that the other choices for this role were Danny Devito, the Sherminator, and Michael J Fox. I mean how else does Gigli get this fucking role? Does nobody remember Daredevil? The answer is "no" because that movie sucked worse than Gigli. I looked for a review but I couldn't find anyone that lasted in the theater past the opening credits.

Am I going to go see the new Batman and Superman movie? Yeah, probably, but that doesn't mean I won't think it sucks.

-Ikerus


Introducing Ikerus as a blogger for Hitsticksports. Always room for someone that's easily angered. Good stuff

Ps. I own Daredevil so shut up about it already

Is this guy trying to show me up?

So this Sophomore at Georgia Tech gave the convocation speech and it's all the fuss.


I'm not ashamed to admit he has me fired up. Kinda like Braveheart fired up. See this kid gets me. I used to be all involved in the Freshman thing. I did it for a living. Welcoming kids and changing their lives is basically what it boils down to. I'm no stranger to speeches either. I pretty much gave the best graduation speech to ever be echoed through the Rivercrest Auditorium. From my understanding they still have it etched into the sidewalk there.





There's no doubt I crush this guy in a speech off. Nick Selby if you're reading this, and I'm sure you probably are, you name the time and place and I'll be there. I would say just post it on the comments but I can't figure that shit out on here.




oh yeah and what the hell was he talking about on number 7? Like if that's stuff from there curriculum count me out. Absolutely no possibility to bullshit my way through that class.

Can we please make it to week 1 already

Word just broke that D'arthur Cowan will miss 6-8 weeks with a foot injury. That's the fourth Razorback injury in the past 5 days. Are you kidding me? These guys must be doing some illegal stuff in practice and that's why they keep it closed. Maybe just beating the shit out of them if they jump offsides or line up in the wrong spot. If that's the case then I'm ok with that, otherwise I just don't get it. It almost made me throw up when I saw that Otha Peters was going to miss substantial time. Luckily I just dry heaved a bunch.

Honestly, do other teams experience as much off season pain as hog fans? This is a serious question because I give zero time to acknowledging any other team besides the Razorbacks. Knile Davis 4 broken ankles. Kiero Small foot surgery. Demetrius Wilson torn ACL. Bobby Petrino broken face.

Hey coach Herbert make these kids drink milk. I can't handle much more of this shit.

If I don't have one of these receivers on my team I'm going to be pissed

This year I think there are 5 WRs that are head and shoulders above the rest.

1.Calvin Johnson- I'll take this guy in the first round as early as pick 4. He's like having two starting players in one. Last year he got tackled at the 1 yard line 4 times. THAT'S STUPID!!!

2.Dez Bryant- If Megatron is off the board and I have pick 11 or 12 I'm not scared to take him. He's the next big thing. He's slap you momma good. too early?

3.AJ Green- Bengals are going to be good and he's going to get the there. Andy Dalton is an efficient QB that keeps them in games and AJ can stretch the field and catch it all. It helps that he's made out of rubber too. I'm taking him anywhere from pick 13-18

4. Brandon Marshall- Him and Jay Cutler are on the same page and the Bears are supposed to have some new high paced, spread you out, type of offense. It wouldn't surprise me if he caught 120 balls this year. I'll draft him in the 2nd round if he gets to me.

5. Julio Jones- People may point to the other targets as reason why not to take him so high, but truthfully it just makes it harder to guard him. This guy could've went pro right out of 9th grade. He just has a genetic advantage that make me hate my parents. Like why am I not built like that? Actually I'd prefer not to have a 5-head like that so I'm good.

The bottom line is that if you choose to go RB, RB in your 1st two rounds, you have absolutely no shot of landing any of these guys. I would much rather grab one of these guys and have a RB duo of say Steven Ridley, Demarco Murray or David Wilson. Otherwise you're going to be looking at Danny Amendola, Dwayne Bowe, or Victor Cruz as your WR1.

The NFL is a passing league now and more and more teams are RB by committee. If you can't snag a top 5 RB you're really hurting yourself by taking a mid level tier 1 RB over one of these guys. The drop off after these 5 is pretty significant. You're also more likely to have a back up RB step into the limelight and score points for your team if the stud RB goes down (Ben Tate, Michael Bush, Bryce Brown). There's not any WR's just standing on the sideline waiting to get in and dominate a fantasy team. Granted you have to stay on your toes and look for the next big thing, but that's what you've got me for!

Brandon Allen please don't suck

I've spoken to a lot of people who are nervous about Brandon Allen being our starting quarterback. I must admit, to start the Bielema Era I wanted Brandon Mitchell to be our guy, as I'm sure a lot of people did. To me it just made sense to make him the our signal caller since he had the ability to make something out of nothing when a play broke down. He was arguably our best physical athlete on the team. He played WR, QB, and dunked all over people when it was time to lace up the tenny pumps. But he's gone now and whether we like it or not, Brandon Allen is the lead hog.

Just like I do every year, I seem to have drank the kool-aid. Red flavored. Made from hog blood. And I hate how much I love it.

I encourage Brandon Allen doubters to please forget about last year. Our coaching staff last year didn't do him any favors. They pretty much made every single player on our team dramatically worse for just having known them. At no point during the season was Brandon Allen set up to succeed. It was like Paul Petrino was teaching him calculus by using only brail. I'm not so sure there were many quarterbacks in the whole country that could've came in and right'd our sinking ship last year. There was no hope.

This year we have hope. This year Brandon Allen has had the opportunity to work with the 1st team every practice. He's been able to establish his huddle and make relationships with his receivers. This year we are going to run the ball to set up the pass where last year we had no choice but to play from behind and throw the ball. It's a lot harder to throw the ball when everyone in the stadium knows that's what you are about to do.

Coach B has stated that Brandon Allen has been the most improved player on the team since his tenure has started. And even though there are other reasons I choose to believe in Allen, like having a better OC, Offensive line, run game, and more practice- I really just trust Coach B. Like when he came in and started changing stuff I just trust him. When he let McKay go to Cincy and BMitch go to NC St, I trusted he was doing the right thing.

I just don't want people to forget how excited we were when Brandon Allen signed with us. He was a 4star recruit that was the #5 pro style quarterback coming out of high school. I went back and watched his high school film and it reminds me of Aaron Rodgers. I'm not saying he's going to win the Hesiman or anything. Well, not this year at least.

We may just go undefeated on the road

Just got a picture of these uni's sent to me and this is what I'm talking about. That sound you hear is Rick Shafer and the rest of the Razorback old quakers crying because we have fire ass helmets. It seems like we had so much debate over the uniforms last year that people didn't realize we were getting our dicks beaten with one of those bats covered in barbed wire. I mean who even makes those bats anyways.

If these road uniforms are any indication of how we are going to play on the road then look out Alabama. Hog Nation coming to take over.


thanks to catfish and Arkansasrazorbacks.com for the photo

Who's number 2?

Fantasy drafts are never won in the first round, but they can definitely be lost. Last year I took Calvin Johnson and made it to the championship. But it wasn't Megatron that got me there, it was the pick up of Alfred Morris after week 2. A few years back I joined my first $100 money league and had the 2nd pick. I took Tom Brady coming off his record setting super bowl runner up year where he threw 62 touchdown passes (rounded up) to Randy Moss. He played less than 1 quarter that year and I didn't make the playoffs.


So this year it's obvious that Adrian Peterson is going to be the 1st pick off the board in 108% of leagues this year. The real question is, who's number 2? Is it Arian Foster? Doug Martin? Marshawn Lynch? CJ Spiller? Jamaal Charles? Trent Richardson?


I lean towards Doug Martin but honestly I don't think any of these players are going to win you the league like stud dick Adrian Peterson can. I do, however, think that they all have a chance to lose you the league this year.



Arian Foster

OK so the Texans have an amazing run game, but just like all backs Foster has started experiencing some wear and tear. He's having back pain and it's causing some leg stiffness and I don't like that. Towards the end of last season they had to go with back ups when they needed him. Losing your #2 pick because of injury can lose you the season. Buyer be ware. At least draft Ben Tate in the 7th round if you take Foster. That just means in round 7 you don't get a starting WR, TE, or QB that will get you points every week.





Doug Martin

I had no idea the muscle hampster was one of the top 5 ugliest players in all pro sports. I mean this guy falls right behind Sam Cassell and Popeye Jones. How do you even see the holes when you don't have eyeballs? Martin got pulled last preseason game because he took a blow to the head. I like Martin and wouldn't hate having him on my team but I'm a little nervous about him having a sophomore slump. He's the only mouth in town to feed though so that counts for something.





Marshawn Lynch

If you know me you know I'm a huge fan of barstool sports and if you know barstool sports then you know skittles are the number one performance enhancing drug on the market. Just crazy good for young athletes wanting to be the best. I'm a little nervous about rumors he may face suspension for a DUI and that he's failed drug tests for Marijuana. I'm also concerned about a back that runs so hard like he does. Pretty much uses his face as a battering ram. Not a lot of receivers in his neck of the woods so I'm thinking it's going to be a ground and pound type of season. The Seahawks have a touted defense and if they get an early lead they're going to be playing clock control football. And there is no doubt this man gets almost all the goal line carries you can ask for. My concern is how's he going to fair with 13 guys in the box?





CJ Spiller

This might be the fastest guy in the NFL. But can you take the bills RB number 2 overall??? I hear good things about this new Bills offense and that they are going to be playing a high pace type of O and Spiller will get the ball through the air as well. That bodes well as a fantasy back, but I have such a hard time going by just stats when doing fantasy. Like I know that's what the name of the game is but the Buffalo Bills? Cmon right? Sometimes I wonder if they will even score a point in some games. Granted they play in a division that matches them up against the lowly Jets and Dolphins twice a year and they play in the cold which means they will run the ball. But CJ Spiller number 2? He's so small and this is the NFL. And did I mention he plays for the Buffalo Bills?





Jamaal Charles

If you're worried about the health of Arian Foster than you have to worry about Jamaal Charles. It sucks because I think Charles can rack up points this year, but there's also a chance he misses substantial time. Andy Reid is going to get this guy the ball and he's going to score points but he's got a foot injury. That's no bueno. A foot injury isn't something that just goes away. I should know. I've been limping around with a bad ankle for 9 months now, otherwise I might have to put myself on this list. Charles also faces the same issues as Spiller. Chiefs are beyond terrible. Alex Smith isn't the answer. Something tells me they will be playing from behind and that means trying to throw the ball. I'm sure Charles will bust a few long runs throughout the year, but I feel it's a huge gamble with the number 2 overall pick.






Trent Richardson

I love some Trent Richardson, but not at #2. If I could get him with the 10th pick I'm excited all day. He's right behind Marshawn Lynch for me. This guy is always banged up too, though. And he plays for the Browns, even though they've looked good in the preseason. Last year T-Rich was game time decision quite a lot and it made it hard for fantasy owners to count on him week in and week out. That's what you are looking for in the #2 pick. He will face stacked boxes every game. He's going to get his and he's going to get goal line touches but he's also going to have a bad shoulder, knee, back, rib, whatever you want to list. His arms may be just too damn big to properly hold a football. Like how many times a game do you think the ref has to put more air in the ball?






So if I had the number 2 pick who do I take? Well when I plug all this shit into a cost/risk analysis based on a bunch of stuff I made up off the top of my head I don't think I'm going to take any of these guys. All the fantasy "experts" sing the song that you're an idiot if you don't take a RB in the first round. I disagree. I want the guy that's for sure going to get me a shit ton of points and let me sleep easy at night.




Give me Drew Brees. I dare you not to make the playoffs with Mr. Birthmark. You can always go RB, RB in rounds 2 and 3 and end up with someone like Demarco Murray and Eddie Lacy. I'm fine with that. Every year there are at least 1 or 2 undrafted RBs that help a team tremendously. Give me Brees or give me death.

Can't sleep, diagnosis:hog fever

I don't know about you but I can't sleep knowing Razorback football starts in less than 2 weeks. Tickets came in the mail this week and shit got real. I don't even know all the players names and numbers by heart yet. I still have so many questions I need answered. Who the hell is going to start at linebacker? Will our secondary be in the picture on pass plays? Will our O-line block a soul? Who will step up and be our go-to wide receiver? How many years in a row will alex collins win the heisman? The list goes on.

But for real, Alex Collins and Jonathan Williams are going to make an impact. Coach Herbert apparently has our offensive lineman all looking like Brock Lesner and we seem to have some depth with young lineman ready to step in and take someones spot. I've heard some grumblings about fearing getting back to the Houston Nutt ground game, but let's not forget how bad ass that really was. We still had a home run threat every play. And I'm not talking about you Casey Dick.

Pam Oliver get's Marsha Brady'd

Hey Pam rule #1 about sports is keep your head on a swivel and be ready for anything. Now get your head out of your ass and get back in there!

What's in a name?

Ok so I know everyone is pretty jealous of the name Stick Tackle Boom Boom- but it's mine. Get your own. Everyone knows games are won and lost by their team names. That's why the Pelicans my never win a game and why the Patriots continue to be the benchmark for a dynasty. Just common sense when you think about it.

So get a jump start and don't pick a shit name. Your name should pick you. It's kind of like when you use your street name and your first pet name to create your porno handle. You don't just google cool porno names, you earn it. You think I want to be called Kitty Kitty Jackson? No. But if the shoe fits, wear it. Right?

Basically don't google Mike Vick dog team names because that shit is played out. I used to play with the neighborhood kids after school and we created a game called Stick Tackle Boom Boom. Pretty much the Oklahoma Drill on a trampoline. Taught me how to tackle, how to hit stick, how to be a man really. My mom told me Stick Tackle Boom Boom was going to be the death of me. Wrong. It made me awesome. It's going to be the death of many fantasy teams.

If you don't spend as much time on your team name as you do your draft you pretty much lost before you started.

Big shout out to some of my favorite team names this year so far:

Blue Steel
Queen Victorious
Fat Belly's Bitches

Don't be scared to share your team names in the comment section....